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Charmed | Episode 6x17 | Hyde School Reunion
Transcribed By: Astrid Jane

Piper: Chris! Hi!
Chris: Hey, look, I need your help. I think I got Scabbars on my tail.
Piper: Oh, err, well, I have some hydrogen peroxide in my bathroom.
Chris: No! Scabbar demons! I went undercover to follow a lead on who follows Wyatt but I think they're on to me. All right, I need a cloaking spell just in case. Is the Book still in the attic?
Paige: Yeah, just so.
Piper: Want me to help you?
*Chris runs up the stairs without answering Piper*

*From upstairs…*
Chris: Someone calling me?
*Back downstairs…*
Piper: Yeah, err, sweetie, could you come here a sec?
Victor: Jeez! He can come out?!
Piper: Oh… err…
*Chris emerges from the stairway*
Chris: Can we hurry this up cause I got to get… Grandpa?!
*Chris hugs a surprised Victor*

Victor: So we're close?
Chris: Yeah, you're awesome, grandpa.
*Victor looks triumphantly at Piper*
Victor: Did you hear that? Awesome!
Chris: Yeah, after the event happened… we got really close.
Piper: What event?
Chris: I can't tell you.
Piper: Is this event umm… my fault? Is that why you're treating me like a non-person?
Chris: I can't talk about it. It will mess with the future.
Victor: But you did say I was awesome, right? You can talk about that.
Chris: Yeah, you're the best! I love hanging out with you.
Victor: I got to admit I'm a little surprised. I mean, it's no secret I wasn't the greatest dad. It means a lot to me that I could do something to make up for it.
Chris: You do.
Piper: After the event…
Chris: Right.
Piper: Which you won't tell me about.
Chris: I told you! I can't talk about it, okay!
Victor: Hey. Don't talk to your mother like that, okay.
Chris: You're right… I'm sorry.
*The sound of the front door opening interrupts them. From the hallway…*
Paige: Piper!

Chris: What happened?
Paige: Well, you've heard of recapturing your youth. I think Phoebe's youth is trying to capture her.
Piper: Explain.
Paige: I don't know. It's like one moment she was totally normal, the next, it's like, she's freaky Phoebe!
Chris: Great! Who else saw?
Paige: No one. She changed back before anyone noticed.
Victor: I'm having a little trouble keeping up here. Phoebe's being chased by what? Demons?
Paige: Maybe inner demons? Or maybe a spell gone wrong? It seemed to happen after someone named Paula Marks called her Phreebie?
Piper: Oh yeah, that'll do it.
Paige: You wanna go upstairs with me and check the Book? See if there's anything?
Piper: Okay…
Chris: You two go ahead. I need to get back to the Scabbar demons before they know I'm missing.
Piper: Hey wait! What? And leave your awesome grandpa alone? Grab a sandwich! Grab a beer! Get an answer!
*Piper leaves. Victor smiles and takes out two cigars from his jacket*
Victor: Cubans?
*Chris looks at him doubtfully but takes one anyway*

*Chris coughs and hands Victor the cigar*
Victor: Sorry… Bad idea.
Chris: It's cool. It's just… It's strong.
Victor: I was just trying to help us… bond a little, you know?
Chris: We don't need help bonding. We're cool.
Victor: In the future! But I haven't been there yet, you know!
*Victor laughs*
Victor: I'm feeling a little out of sync here. Umm… Well… You hungry? You wanna grab a bite?
Chris: Yeah, yeah, umm, that'll be great. Just, umm, let me change first, okay?
Victor: Okay…
*Chris walks off but pauses*
Chris: Err… Listen, about those things, you might wanna pick up a different habit. To avoid any future problems, if you know what I mean.
*Victor looks at Chris for a moment before frantically snuffing out his cigar*
Victor: Oh! Jeez! Thanks for the tip!

Chris: Uh… What is the… Gig got?
Waiter: Gigot. It's your choice. Leg of lamb or MUtton.
*Chris looks at the waiter*
Waiter: Mutton.
Chris: Oh. What is that? Meat?
Waiter: Yes, it's meat. Comes for a sheep. You know… baa baa?
Victor: Why don't you bring us a couple of steaks, please? Medium. Thank you.
*Chris makes a sound of disbelief*
Victor: Sorry, I thought you might like a fancy meal.
Chris: Why?
Victor: Trying to live up to my rep.
Chris: With cigars and MUtton? Sorry grandpa, that's not how you did it.
Victor: Did I take you to betting cages?
Chris: No.
Victor: Strip clubs?
Chris: God, no!
Victor: What did I do? You got to tell me because I am crashing here!
Chris: Nothing… You just… We talked.
Victor: Oh.
Chris: Look, we should just get back. I'm undercover with some demons. They're going to be looking for me very soon.
Victor: No, no… Wait. Let's talk. We need to talk.
Chris: Let me guess. Piper asked you to come here to find out what's wrong with me, right?
Victor: She just wants to know why she's such a terrible mother.
Chris: She what?! No, no… She's great!
Victor: Then why are you treating her like she doesn't exist?
*Chris fidgets*
Victor: Chris. If what we do is talk. Talk to me.
Chris: Because she doesn't exist in my future, okay? She dies when I turn 14.
Victor: That's the event?
*Chris nods*
Victor: But how?!
Chris: I can't, all right. I've already said way too much. The point is, after I save Wyatt, I have to go back to where she isn't. I can't get close to her because I don't wanna lose her again.
Victor: Maybe that's all the more reason to get close to her.

*Chris orbs in with a shocked Victor*
Piper: You're okay?
Victor: Who says I'm okay?
*Chris laughs*
Chris: Don't worry. You'll get used to orbing in the future.
Piper: I thought something might have happened to you.
Chris: No. We're fine. We just… talked… Really. I'm fine.
*Victor lets out a breath*
Paige: Yeah, well, Phoebe is not. She's out there running around with her old gang.
Victor: I thought she was downstairs.
Piper: No, she's out the window.
Paige: And even worse, she under the influence…
Chris: Of alcohol?
Paige: No, adolescence.
Piper: She stole a cop car as a prank.
Victor: That's not a prank. It's a felony.
Paige: Yeah, well, teen Phoebe also happens to have her adult powers and she cast a spell on her entire reunion class.
Chris: What?!
Piper: Don't worry. Paige was able to reverse it all but…
*Piper weaves unsteadily. Chris grabs her arms*
Chris: Whoa whoa… hey… Are you okay?
Piper: Yeah, I'm just a little lightheaded.
Chris: Sorry… you know… about me.
Piper: Must have been some hell of a talk there.
Victor: Yep. Got to get off your feet, honey… Come on.
*Victor leads Piper off*
Chris: Look, we need to stop Phoebe before she gets into some trouble that we can't get her out of.
Paige: I'm trying. She keeps moving. Ahh! I got her!
*As the scrying crystal pinpoints a location, two Scabbar demons shimmer in. They spit acid at Chris but he orbs away in time. He reappears next to Paige who is hiding behind a table*
Paige: Glass!
*A shard of glass stabs one demon but doesn't have any effect. Piper runs in*
Piper: Get back!
*Piper tries to blow up the demon but it doesn't work. The other demon spits acid in their direction*
Paige: Icky stuff!
*The acid flies back in the demon's direction and vanquishes him. The other demon shimmers out*
Piper: Icky stuff?
Paige: It worked.
*Chris hands Paige the Book of Shadows*
Chris: Here… Sorry about all these.
Piper: It's okay. Kids are messy.
Chris: They'll be back.
Piper: Then we'll handle it.
Paige: Uh oh!
*Paige lifts a burnt scrying crystal*
Paige: Any idea how we're gonna find Phoebe now?

Piper: The crystals should protect you. They won't be able to find you as long as you stay in the attic.
Chris: Are you sure about that?
Piper: Well, I'm pretty sure.
Chris: Okay, well, you and Wyatt need to go some place safe. I'm gonna go get him.
Piper: No! You are not leaving this room!
Chris: What about you?
Piper: What about me? I have to stay here and help Paige summon Phoebe!
Chris: I'm part-witch remember? I can help Paige do that.
Piper: You can't vanquish the demons if they come and attack again.
Chris: Well, I can try.
Victor: Listen to your mother, Chris.
Chris: What if something happens to her?!
Piper: Nothing's gonna happen to me. Unless you know something that I don't?
Victor: Nothing's gonna happen to you, honey. Not now.
Piper: Oh. So when? Chris? Is that what you've been living with? Knowing that something happens to me? I see… Well, does it happen soon?
Chris: I can't tell you that. It could change the future in even worse ways.
Piper: Right. But isn't that why you came here in the first place? To make the future better? How do you know you haven't already changed mine?
Victor: She's got a point.
Piper: Well, whatever it is. It obviously doesn't happen until you're born. So, save it. Got it?
Chris: I got it… Mom…
Piper: Huh?
*Piper smiles happily at Chris*

*Rick looks in the mirror*
Rick: Yeah, I like it. This'll work.
Paige: Pheebs, watch out. This could get messy.
*Three Scabbar demons shimmer in. Rick fires his shotgun at them to no avail. They spit poison at Rick*